Expressing anger at the right time gives you twofold benefits: you get what you want without escalating little conflicts into a disaster, and other people also get to know the boundaries they are to observe when they are dealing with you. Expressing anger is a skill you need to master in your everyday life, although it is not an easy process but it worth the effort. If we can control our unnecessary anger, we will always be in control of how we treat others, and most importantly ourselves. Expressing anger in relationships, workplaces, at home, and wherever we find ourselves is necessary in building trust since they get to know the real you. In this post, I have gathered some clear and concise guidelines for expressing anger check them below.
1. Be clear and specific and take responsibility for your statement. Don’t blame. For example ‘I feel angry when you’re late!’ not ‘You make me feel angry.’
2. Listen to the other person’s point of view.
3. Focus on your goal of getting your statement across clearly, and don’t get stuck with negative feelings.
4. Sometimes we express our anger, but hold on to some of it, perhaps, because we are afraid of really being honest about showing it. The assertive approach is acknowledging that you have the right to express your feelings. Do not smile when you are saying you are angry. If you do, what will come across is the mixed message that you do not really mean what you are saying.
5. It is possible to express anger and show you care about the person at the same time. For example ‘I realize you may find this difficult to understand, I realize you were in a hurry, but I didn’t like the way you cut me short this morning.’